Monday, September 17, 2012

My submission to a scholarship contest.

This may not be your cup of tea, but if you're willing, I'd appreciate you taking the time to read this.           


          “Let me give you a tip on a clue to men’s characters: the man who damns money has obtained it dishonorably; the man who respects it has earned it.”  Francisco D’Anconia

            As a much younger man, I completely missed this statement.  I can find no reason for that omission in memory other than to say: my youth hadn’t experienced enough to understand how profound that statement is.  Now, as a father to five, who, in the not too distant future, will experience that which I’ve referred through their entire childhoods as “the real world,” I find Francisco’s words carry more meaning, more truth than my days preceding fatherhood could ever hope to fathom.
            Two sides fight for supremacy over the currency of a nation – no, that’s not right exactly; two sides fight for the value of currency.  Not for the values printed or stamped to the paper and metal, but to the men and women who seek to gain it, the means to which they seek to acquire it, and their reasons for doing so.
            The men of the mind believe that money is theirs to earn and to enjoy.  The “looters” as Ms. Rand labeled them believe that money exists only as means of destruction of society, they just refuse to acknowledge that they understand their beliefs.  To them, money is a barrier that separates good from evil.  Evil are the men who seek to gain wealth from their accomplishments.  The good are those who continually give theirs away for the benefit of a society whose needs outweigh those of the earner. 
            Dagny experiences a moment in her teen age years that defines, to her, the true purpose of wealth.  Her mother hosts this lavish, formal affair for her.  Being a true child of Nathaniel Taggart, she at an early age comprehends the concept of hard work and dedication to one’s trade.  She always knew she was proper heir to Taggart Transcontinental, and she would operate and manage it effectively and successfully.  Her party was something she hoped to enjoy, only to find that those in attendance never and would never understand the purpose of an occasion such as hers.  Hank Rearden and Dagny spoke to this moment later when Hank finally understood the purpose of his wealth:  Enjoyment.  Dagny, at the party her mother had thrown, couldn’t enjoy hers when the world around her flaunted their wealth for the purpose of making an impression to those around them, while Hank couldn’t enjoy his due to the people around him constantly punishing him for having it.  Through his relationship with Dagny, Hank eventually learns how to enjoy his wealth through their shared morality.  He bought her gifts for his pleasure, not for hers.  This is an important step Hank takes before he dies later in the book, at least his ego does.  She admired the spirit of a man who asked for nothing from anyone and demanded the same in return.  He loved a woman who exacted those very principles upon him.
When I think to Ellis Wyatt’s home in Colorado, the mental image I have is of a house warm and inviting.  I see a living room that speaks to the character of its owner.  A couch that is beautiful and impressive framed by two sturdy, handmade end tables built of mahogany to last generations.  Impressive, yet understated.  Expensive, but not pretentious.  The overall feeling I would get walking through Wyatt’s residence is, “This is someone’s home.”  Every piece of furniture, every fixture in place because its owner wanted it and chose it, not to impress his peers, but because the piece impressed him, thereby becoming an extension of him.  His personality on display for those who entered his home to witness. 
On the other hand, if one were to picture James Taggart or Wesley Mouch’s homes they would find the exact opposite in place when they entered.  Everything would be beautiful, but for all the wrong reasons.  Furnishings would be there for the purposes of being there.  They would have been picked for the price on the tag, rather than the value placed upon them by their owner. They would be bragged about for their value while not being valued in the least.  The houses would be domiciles full of all the finer things money could buy, comforts purchased under the ruse of hospitality, but fooling no one into believing they were welcome inside.  James and Wesley would have their homes decorated by someone else.  The reasons for this are two: because they had the money to afford it and because they really didn’t care.  They were more interested in keeping up appearances and out doing the company they kept around them.
Imagine Hank Reardon and James Taggart behind their desks in suits and ties.  Both suits tailored by the same individual, in fact, alike in all respects.  It would be easy for me to know which man was the better of the two.  I would know because each would wear their suit differently.  Hank would be at home in his.  He wouldn’t constantly check his appearance to assure his tie was straight, his lapels flat.  James, on the other hand, would.  His reasons for doing so tie directly to my train of logic:  James and his friends, very simply put, just do not get it.
Ms. Rand leads her readers on path of villainy and corruption perpetrated by fools who pretend not to know what they are doing.  I completely disagree.  They don’t know.  They’ve been trained, by Ms. Rand’s own admission, to not have to know.  Centuries of human civilization have conditioned these men and women of the United States of America to have a sense of entitlement and have been assured that’s it proper.  “If I want or need it, then I should have it.”  The true villain of Atlas Shrugged, James Taggart, adds validity to my belief. He is the embodiment of all that is wrong with the community first mentality.  He helps plan the destruction of society and is the first to hold his hand out when he suffers for it, citing his need.  At the end of the novel while in the process of attempting to murder John Galt, Taggart only then comprehends what he is, and it destroys him.  Just as Hank’s ego dies with the riot at his mills, James’ ego dies with his sudden self- awareness.  What happens to James goes unnoticed by the others in the room, save Galt.  They don’t know what Taggart discovered and just assume he has finally broken down.  They carry James out of the room not understanding why John Galt refuses to save them and why the men of the mind deserted them, but I do:
John Galt and all his strikers get it.
Money is not the root of all evil.  Money is paper and metal.  It’s a check backed by gold, rather than an account at a bank.  Man’s attitude is what determines money’s true value.  In other words, look to the examples I’ve given, men who respect money choose to earn every dime they touch and spend it for the benefit of enjoying that which they earned.  They ask nothing in return, but to respect what they value above all else, freedom; freedom to exist as the people who achieve and create for the rest of humanity, and to be left alone to do so.  Where the evil lies, comes from those, as D’Anconia states, who don’t respect money.  It’s not really the money they don’t respect, it’s the effort, knowledge, dedication, and intelligence needed to earn it.  Finally, let me add this:  those people who demand something for nothing, those who have expectations for some sense of entitlement due to need or just plain want, those who have chosen to live by this moral code, have respect for nothing at all.  Not money, not their brothers’ lives, and most especially not their own.

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Daughters

Today is the 21st birthday of my guitar player's daughter.  Beautiful and smart, in a relationship with a man who treats her well, adores her, and she feels the same for him.  The combination of that along with the episodes of "Say Yes To The Dress" I've seen while watching with my mom and showing Zoe family photos yesterday sparked some thoughts of my own daughters.

For those of you who don't know, I have three.  12, 10, and 18 months.  They're all beautiful and smart.  Of course, I supposed to believe that.  In this case it happens to be true.  They each are individualists and carbon copies of Dawn and me.  They are head strong, stubborn, obstinate, and have an incessant need to be right all the time.  (shut up all of you)  They are also funny, witty, entertaining little ladies who have hearts the size of mountains.  Every day I'm proud to be their daddy.  Every day they make me fall in love with them again.

It's a tough job being a dad to girls.  For example, unlike with my two boys, I can't stick my foot up their asses when they do wrong.  If I raise my voice too much it makes them cry, which to me is okay to certain levels, but it still just hurts my heart to see the tears well up.  They're fragile.  And, despite the fact that I know it, Dawn still reminds me. 

Which brings me to my point.  They are fragile....

And no stupid sumbitch man is going to hurt them....ever!  sigh.

Being a controller type personality, this is my biggest struggle.  The older two already are starting to see boys as the opposite sex and not just kids to play with.  This is a terrible feeling for a father, but they're still young enough for me to not worry about....that dirty scumbag high school kid who will spout a cornucopia of bullshit with one objective in mind.  That's the little bastard I fear.  If teen boys understood that, they'd realize they have the upper hand in the dynamic.  That's why as fathers we tend to do our absolute best to put the fear of death in their brains, both of them.  What am I saying?  I was there once and though I was respectful, I had no fear.  So.  For the future suitors of my daughters there will be no empty threats, no promises I know I can't keep, but there will be a trainload of insinuation.  There will be the day spent out in the field showing the little seed spreader just how good I can shoot a rifle and from how far away my aim is still true....with a scope or open sights.  They'll learn to fear what I can do, but never really know if I'll do it.  That's humaity's biggest fear.  The Unknown.  That's my weapon and it is a damn good one.  Don't get me wrong, I'll let the little bullshit artist attend family functions.  I'll let him come to the house to hang out.  I'll let him take my pure as the driven snow angels on dates.  They won't be alone, but he won't know that.  The girls' brothers take this shit seriously too.  They are destined to be experts at infiltration and exfiltration bringing back all intel to me...the Director of the CIAOMH.

Now, don't get me wrong.  I recognize that I need to be worried about my girls as well.  That's why I've been planting seeds with them for years.  They've heard me tell them of the lies they will be told.  They're being taught to honor themselves.  Their bodies are their own, belonging to themselves.  No amount of pleading, rationalizing, or cajoling can change that.  We're also working on the open communication between them and us.  We want to know when he-who-thinks-with-his-pecker says stupid things like "If you really loved me you do it" or "I want to prove how much I love you."  They won't do that if they're afraid of the reaction they'll get from me.  Truthfully, that's the hardest part. 

I've also instituted the "You will not date anyone who doesn't come and ask us first" policy.  Pretty self-explanatory.  I figure with the amount of respect the younger generation shows these days, that'll limit their social lives with those horny little shits.  And, despite how smart my children are, they're not wiser than us.  We've been there.  We've done it.  We have the children to prove it.  Just kidding.  Point is, "the wool" will not be pulled over our eyes.  Technology is a wonderful thing.  Using technology subversively is even more wonderful.  I'm not doing my job as a dad if I don't check up on the things the kids say they're doing.  Do I trust my kids?  Yes.  Do I trust them unconditionally?  Hell.  No.  That's just stupid.  They're kids.  That's what kids do.  Any person who says they never lied to their parents is either one in a million or completely full of shit.  So my darling daughters, when you tell me that you're going to Becky's to spend the night expect me to make sure that's what you're doing.  You can get pissed at me all you want, but it's my job.  No apologies from this end.

If all else fails folks, I can always use my secret weapon.  It's a destructive force of immeasurable strength.  Her name is Dawn.  She's their mother.

"Fathers be good to your daughters
daughters will love as you do
girls become lovers who turn into mothers
so mothers be good to your daughter too." - John Mayer

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Changes Coming......

Hello All.

Been a while since I put thoughts to fingertips and keystrokes. I've discovered this blogging thing is a discipline. If only I could type as fast as the thoughts in my head.

So. Changes coming. That's the topic. However, its not really what I'm here to talk about today. I'm here really as close to how I personally got to the change.

The changes are two. One, we are adding a new female member to the group. No names yet as it's an exciting announcement that should be given its just reward when we're ready to go. So be ready for that one.

The second has been the most difficult. I'll just come out and say that as a country artist, who lives in Las Vegas, Nevada, it's time for me to evolve. You know what kind of Country music I play as well as the kind I've tried to avoid playing. It's time to stop doing that. In a market such as I'm in where Merle and Waylon are often referred to as "who?" it's time to start playing the more modern music if I plan to make a living at this profession. Idealism is great.....except idealism hasn't been paying the bills. I imagine some of you may think I'm selling out, but for my family I would do just about anything to provide for them. My only real regret is that I've taken this long to reach this conclusion. I'm reminded of a guy I once knew in my younger, cockier years I was giving a hard time about some of the songs in his catalog. I asked why this one particular song I felt was ridiculous and he sharply (and correctly) told me that he plays the songs people want to hear. Damn.

I've been holding on to my idea of what Country music is and how it should be handled for so long that I lost sight of the obvious: I am supposed to play the songs the crowd wants to hear. I've been playing the songs that I wanted to play assuming that "real" country fans wanted to hear them. I was called a snob today because of that fact and it occured to me that it was an accurate assessment of me. As a cover band, it's my job to think of the crowd first. I can be the same entertainer no matter the song I sing. When the crowd's right, I can play the songs I want to play, the songs I know they want to hear. Those are called rodeo crowds. Cowboys and country music fans are not cut of the same cloth despite liking similar music. Epiphany. As the saying goes, "you're never too old to learn." Or perhaps, in my case, never too old to accept the truth.

So, in conclusion, I'm choosing to evolve as an entertainer. I'm not changing personally. I'm not even giving up the music I most love to play. I'm adding to what made me who I was before that's all. I can choose do it regretably or begrudgingly or I can be happy about it and make the most of it. I'm still singing. I'm still getting paid to do a job I love. Why not be happy about it? Why not take some of these songs and make them my own? Oh wait, I do that with most everything anyway!

I look forward what's on the horizon for STHDD! Hope you are too!

p.s. I'm still not going to sing Red Solo Cup.